Part 1: Acedia

I know this type of situation all too well
I overthink, I make mistakes, I can’t let go
Boundaries or solid walls, I cannot tell
If what I say is true, I never know

Rumination is a irksome child
Hell bent on planting immaturity
Distorting what is real and running wild
Devolving into depravity
Devolving into depravity

Don’t mind me
My codependent dream
All I see
Is a victim at my feet

If there was anything that I fear the most
Is that you would become another her
A blackbird and a morose kind of ghost
Reminders of the mentally disturbed

Me, a manipulative
Me, an impulsive
Me, a broken toxic
Me, misguided toddler

Don’t mind me
My codependent dream
All I see
Is a victim at my feet

If I say aloud what lurks in my head
Will I cross a line, make it worse in the end
I cannot take it, if it means that I break again
I’m breaking

Don’t mind me
My codependent dream
All I see
Is a victim at my feet

Ignore moi
Je ne suis personne que tu veux voir
Why’d it take so long to see
That you and I would never be!

Part 2: Little One (Major)
Make Peace
With the fantasy in your head
Please cease
The ruminations plaguing

It all happened so long ago
You're better than you were before
It's just like she said
You both were just kids

Even if you never get a chance
To be the man you wish you could back then
Cut yourself some slack you made amends
Little one you're better than back then

Grief underneath
Is it warranted or just self inflicted?
Cycle through to justify the means
To everything you believe

Manufacturing reality
Seeking confirmation bias in everything
Dissonance within your dreams
You don't want to admit you benefit from the traumatic things

Even if you never get a chance
To be the man you wish you could back then
Cut yourself some slack you made amends
Little one you're better than back then

Make Peace
(I know this type of situation all to well)
With the fantasy in your head
(I overthink, I make mistakes, I can't let go)
Please cease
(Boundaries or solid walls I cannot tell)
The ruminations plaguing
(If what I say is true, I never know)

It all happened so long ago
(Rumination is a irksome child)
You're better than you were before
(Hell bent on planting immaturity)
It's just like she said
(Distorting what is real and running wild)
You both were just kids
(Devolving into depravity)

Even if you never get a chance
To be the man you wish you could back then
Cut yourself some slack you made amends
Little one you're better than back then

Her name doesn't matter in the grand scheme of the end
It’s just another story, why insist on even keeping track?
They are all the past, it's not as if they're coming back
You're better off than you were back then